But, first, before I start moping about the failures, I have to start with a pretty big success (as far as aiding goes). I had the opportunity to get out of my seat and read the read aloud book! First period on Friday, I noticed that the students were a chapter ahead of me. Yet, my supervising teacher read the next chapter of the book aloud anyway, but luckily, one of the students summed up the previous chapter, so I felt caught up. After listening to the chapter and engaging in discussion, the students had individual work that they needed to get done. They started working on a project for the play that they had read, "The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street." The students had already worked with a plot diagram, but now their task was to make a visual plot diagram. So, while they were working on that, I read the chapter that I had missed.
When I came back for 3rd period, I was ready to take another risk. I asked my teacher if I could read the new chapter for the read aloud. She didn't seem hesitant, but she definitely seemed surprised. If there's one thing that I love doing and feel that I thrive at, it is reading aloud with expression. And, after listening to the chapter once before, I knew how I was going to read it. It felt great, and I know that the students were engaged. The chapter of Out of My Mind was a pretty good one, so I'm thrilled that I was given that opportunity. Taking those risks definitely paid off. I felt like I could be a successful teacher.
Another success that came from taking risks was being able to run check-in. Each day, the teacher checks in with each individual to see what page they were on. Now that I know the students' names, it was easier for me to go through the list and ask for the page. It was not much, but it felt like a step forward from sitting in the back of the class all the time or just walking around and monitoring the class. Monday of the following week, I was able to do that.
Also, in 2nd period, the supervising teacher let me grade BINGO for completion. They had to have 11 full pages, and she instructed me to take off points for not really putting in effort or filling the page up. I felt pretty powerful, although I did have to double check with the teacher a few times. But, hey, that's how you learn, I guess.
So, it seems like I had some pretty average successes. Regardless of what they were, it made me feel more present--more needed rather than an accessory. Being a teacher has been a lot of fun so far, but then there's times where you feel that you have failed as a teacher.
In the 1st period class, on Friday, they had presentations for their Monsters project. They had their visual plot diagrams finished already, and their task was to explain two parts of the plot as well as its corresponding pictures. It was an easy A in my opinion. They already did all the difficult work. It was just explaining their work, like they would do if they were telling about a movie they saw or a book they read to a friend.
When it got to one student's turn (let's say his name was Sam), he got up there with what looked like an unfinished drawing. It wasn't colored, but I had known Sam to not really put too much effort into his work. In fact, he was a consistent troublemaker that would talk out of turn with no avail. Sam walked up to the front of the classroom with his drawing and started talking about the exposition and the climax of the story, but he decided to be "funny." Rather than sticking to the plot, he made up a dramatized and inappropriate version of the story using names not in the text. It was very disrespectful. My teachers and I all managed to keep a disappointed face on while the rest of the students were laughing up a storm. I felt so bad for my supervising teachers. It made me wonder--how do you get a student that does not care to actually care?
This failure made me want to learn from it and figure out a way to make kids like Sam more engaged where they just don't care. He doesn't seem to enjoy books, so what am I supposed to do? That's always something I have to ponder as my time to become a teacher draws close.
My goals for this next week are to look for those little successes and take more risks. If I want to be a teacher, I need to get up and actually do something.
Hopefully the successes outweigh the failures this upcoming week.
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